Eyre Affairs

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Location: New York, United States

Monday, February 20, 2006

"Take this advice..." ~ Jane Eyre

I love my parents. Here is some random advice they have given over the years...

20 Things From My Dad:
1. The best man to ever live, besides your grandfather, was Abe Lincoln.
2. They don't make anything like they used to.
3. Johnny Depp is the best actor around these days; these other hot shots don't have any talent at all.
4. Grandchildren are meant to be spoiled. Rotten.
5. No one can cook like your Grandmother Anoush did.
6. Don't spend a lot of money.
7. Be independent and be "a tough kid."
8. Eggs benedict is the best breakfast out there.
9. Read this. And this. And read this book, too.
10. New Orleans is the best city in the world.
11. Don't tell your mother anything.
12. Modern art is fine, but classical art is better.
13. Bix Biderbeck was probably the best jazz musician.
14. Your sisters have a better eye for a camera (my dad is a photographer).
15. Jimmy Buffett is a great lyricist.
16. You will always be "my pal."
17. Be practical!
18. Don't be so picky.
19. Stubbornness is an excellent family trait to have inherited.
20. It is better to give than to receive.

20 Things From My Mom:
1. Wash your hands three times with hot, soapy water.
2. Chocolate is a food group.
3. I don't care if the person is an axe murderer: if the person is Armenian, than the person is good.
4. Dogs and grandchildren are meant to be spoiled. Rotten.
5. Writing is a special way to express oneself.
6. Always send a Hallmark card.
7. DooWop is the best music in the history of types of music.
8. Always be a goody two shoes.
9. Drive sloooowly.
10. If its on sale, than you have to buy it.
11. Cats aren't likeable animals.
12. Be an empathetic and sympathetic person.
13. Take care of those who are ill.
14. Get plenty of sleep.
15. Don't walk around barefoot: wear slippers.
16. Take your vitamins!
17. Never, ever eat fast food.
18. Don't eat sugary cereals and don't drink sugary juices.
19. Love your children deeply, and your grandchildren even more deeply.
20. Your talents are special, so use them!


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