Eyre Affairs

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Location: New York, United States

Tuesday, August 29, 2006

"Wipe away the trickling gore..." ~ Jane Eyre

Readers, forgive me.

The hour is late, and it is just about the 8th hour of today's 24 that I am working on my Edgar Allan Poe unit. With inspiration from Marty, I have decided to start off my American Lit classes this year with a unit on Poe's poetry and prose.

Reading Poe's poems and prose got me thinking about a great artist named Edward Gorey. Am I sounding precocious when I say I loved watching Mystery on PBS as a kid because Gorey did the introduction for the show with animation of his sinister characters and morbid scenarios? My favorite pieces were always with Helen Mirren.

Please know I mean this trite post with only one intent: to parallel something already created and created in jest. By no means do I wish anyone harm, and by no means do I have intentions to fall down the stairs a la Scarlett O'Hara.

Hence, I hope you enjoy my homage to Edgar Allan Poe, Edward Gorey, and, well, all of you! I had to move some letters around to fit names. There are many an inside joke, so I hope this brings a smile. if I left someone out, please forgive me. Oh, and if I put you in, please forgive me, too!

A is for Amy who fell down the stairs.
B is for Boneman whose femurs shattered in pairs.

C is for Cora who was bitten by a rabid dog.
D is for Darius who was struck with a Lincoln log.

E is for Emily who became entangled in yarn.
F is for Freya who smacked her muzzle into the barn.

G is for the Girl named Kels who slipped on a candy dish.
H is for Heather at the beach who was stung by a jellyfish.

I is for incredible Shaumi who fell into the very hot sauna.
J is for Josephine who tripped on her newly watered lawn-a.

K is for K9 who was attacked by a big bobcat.
L is for Lady Wordsmith who was silenced by a bat.

M is for Marty who was attacked by her action figure set.
N is for Naked Manatee who got caught in a fishing net.

O is for the oratory Bird who crashed into the street.
P is for the Pukk who choked on buckwheat.

Q is for Question Girl who fell into the muck.
R is for is for Ryane who was preyed on by a duck.

S is for Seskel who drowned in the butter of a peanut.
T is for Thoughtsgalore whose poisoned coffee caused her eyes to shut.

U is for the uberfoodie Kate who bit too hard into a shark's fin.
V is for vivacious Auto who fell into the trash bin.

W is for wonderful Lynn who was buried under too many new clothes.
X is for X. Dell who was abducted by UFO's.

Y is for the young Popsicle Toes who stepped into quicksand.
Z is for the zesty Work in Progress who had a fight with her wedding band.


Blogger Marty said...

Alas, I am undone.

You make me proud, O poetic raven.
(No, I won't get off the raven references!)

I mean, Ahem, Thursday.


(That was great! You definitely made me smile. Made Ed smile too. As Will says, "There's the rub!")

12:04 AM  
Blogger Seskel said...

Ach I love that book.

12:11 AM  
Blogger Bird said...

what a delight!

12:28 AM  
Blogger Connie said...

Youch - trash bin!


Way to go. I love Poe.

1:11 AM  
Blogger work in progress said...

That was fun!

9:16 AM  
Blogger ThoughtsGalore said...

I remember, vividly, my Poe section in High School Lit. Loved it, was scared by it....and soaked everything in and made me love literature all the more.

Coffee Hunny?

9:18 AM  
Blogger Clearlykels said...

Oh I loved it!!!What a fun idea.

10:35 AM  
Blogger afromabq said...

you're too cute! and too creative for your own good.

2:10 PM  
Blogger Mayden's Voyage said...

O! Joy! This was fun!!!
And what a nice surprise :)

I went to Barnes and noble to buy a copy of "Ney York for Dummies" (I will be there late September, early october)...and thought of you when I saw a booklet called
"Day Spark"- and it was a writing tool for English Lit teachers :)

Every page had a new "spark" to engage the classroom. Some things needed to be rewritten in the student's own words, some were questions to be answered- and so on.
And I smiled and thought, "Amy would love this!" :) I liked it too- I almost bought a copy for myself...I loved the exercises inside :)

I'll be emailing you soon with a few questions about the upcoming trip-and X has been very gracious with advice.

Hope you are having a great day :)

3:15 PM  
Blogger Ryane said...

OMG, Amy, that was hilarious--preyed upon by a duck!!! I am going to be laughing about that for the rest of the afternoon, and probably into tomorrow...

That was a very inspired post. Your classes are in for a fabulous school year if you are starting them off w/Poe. You should bring them down to Baltimore to visit his grave...

3:45 PM  
Blogger Morgen said...

Ah! Poe & The Ghastly Crumb Tinies! Two of my favorite things!
Love your site! (found it via Weight Of The Words)

4:22 PM  
Blogger schaumi said...

I think starting off with Poe is a great idea!
And i loved our Poe tributes.....:)

4:44 PM  
Blogger ThursdayNext said...

Marty ~ I am glad you, Ed, and Will approved. :) Thanks again for the inspiration!

Seskel ~ I wish I could get his Amy print framed somehow!

Birdie ~ Happy that you were delighted!

Auto ~ Well, I figured after the advice the airline gave it was fitting. ;)

WIP ~ It was fun to write, too!

TG ~ Yep, the only poisonous coffee I can think in real life is instant! heehee xoxoxo

Kels ~ Glad you liked it!

PToes ~ I am blushing; you are too kind.

Cora ~ If you have the time when you are here, I would love to come in the city and meet up with you for a cocktail? Yes, lets chat via email! I have tons of recs for you, and thanks for the rec of that book for me.

Ryane ~ The shoe post inspired me with the duck theme por vous! Stupidly, when I was in Baltimore last summer I missed getting to his gravesite. Grrrrr.

Morgen ~ Welcome to Eyre Affairs! Thank you so much for taking the time to visit here; I look foward to heading to your blog! Arent the ghastly crumb tinies the best? :)

Schaumi ~ Ooo I am glad you liked it!

9:11 PM  
Blogger Kate said...

having never had shark fin, i feel this post of yours must be a foreboding omen...i shall be certain to approach all large, man-eating fish (and their fins) with caution.

Great post =)

10:40 PM  
Blogger David said...

What fun, Amy! I am strangely attracted to nets. They are so...netty.
Ryane's duck was a particularly inspired touch. :)

10:22 AM  
Anonymous Lynn said...

This was fun! I love Edward Gorey and at one time was very inspired by Poe.

11:27 AM  
Blogger Morgen said...

Have you read The Poe Shadow by Matthew Pearl?
I've signed up for the author-led Barnes & Noble online discussion of this book, and was just curious.

1:29 PM  
Blogger beachgirl said...

Oh I loved it!!! Oh those jellyfishes!!

2:05 PM  
Anonymous lime said...

ha ha

(that's not a real comment, but i'm drawing a blank here.)

6:04 PM  
Blogger kate said...

Clever Clever Clever! I like it!

cheers! Kate (no relation to the shark lover! *wink)

7:57 PM  
Blogger Bird said...

bird is singing - love this!

11:52 PM  
Blogger gautami tripathy said...

How come I had missed visiting your blog till date?

I love Jane Eyre!

2:03 PM  
Blogger K9 said...

/bark bark bark

grrrrrrrrherherhahaha! what a delightful and wicked demise for us all!!! i love the one attacked by her action figures---that and so many great visuals. good one miss lady jane!! loved it. and, great way to kick off the school year with a fun gothic bang. yay!


3:39 PM  
Blogger question girl said...

Q is for Question Girl who fell into the muck.

YIPPI - i'm famous, err... maybe infamous would be better....

awsome writing as ususal amy

4:11 PM  

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