Eyre Affairs

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Sunday, September 10, 2006


"I must dip my hand again and again in the basin of blood and water..." ~ Jane Eyre

For the second night in a row, the moon above New York is red.

It's as if the moon is cognizant of the calendar, here to harvest another set of tears on a day that seems not five years ago, but rather five minutes ago. That is how raw it is.

So raw it is red.

I stare up at the moon as I did last night, and this time Robert Plant is singing "Baby, I'm Gonna Leave You" as I gaze out of the window of my car.

I just left my baby nephew, Jack, sleeping peacefully. Missy and Ed had gone to celebrate his godparents' ten year anniversary tonight, so I went to him. Jack's godmother was late to work that day and never made it to WTC, where she worked at Morgan Stanley. She was tired that morning and late getting into WTC since it was only a few days after finding out that she was having a baby. The subway pulled into WTC, the doors never opened, and she was taken back out. None of us knew she was alive until well into the afternoon.

Gabby's baby didn't have a father anymore. I knew that when I saw Gabby on the floor at work. 103 and 104: the bloodiest of floors. There he was at Cantor Fitzgerald, where his desk held a picture of his baby girl; the photo fell down 103 floors, as did he.

At the bottom lay the friend of a friend's daughter, dead with blood all over after being hit with falling debris on her head. She made it out of the building alive, but not the area. Within her also lay her unborn baby who was at 7 months. Last summer, this dead woman's husband committed suicide, unable to cope with the loss of his wife and unborn baby.

Until these sick fanatical heathens love their babies more than they hate us, there shall never be peace. In the end, it is their innocent babies who suffer most and who I feel the most sorry for.

And I know that one day baby, it's really gonna grow, yes it is.
We gonna go walkin' through the park every day.
Come what may, every day...

13 Comments:

Blogger Mom of Three said...

I really don't think they do, sadly. Especially not the girl ones.

But I suspect if they killed or converted every single last one of us, they'd still hate someone else. Call it the sadder part of human nature.

10:35 PM  
Anonymous rossi said...

what a sad
tortured image
so much horror
how to erase this scar from our world
it cant be
just gets softer over the years
maybe bleaches a bit

7:23 AM  
Blogger Barry said...

This was a great post - amazing how the moon is red.

You are right about the hate - too bad they don't understand how good it would be not to have that

7:25 AM  
Blogger David said...

Raw, moving, elegiac-- as usual you use your powers for good, Amy.
I remember on Sept. 11th I saw a truck drive by with an American flag strapped to the antenna, blowing in the wind. (Keep in mind it was not as ubiquitous as they are today.) For the first time in my life I felt a lump in my throat and tears welled in my eyes at the sight of the stars and stripes. I had never felt so unified with my country.
What I never got was the why. Why NY, especially. New York City...that's not only America, it belongs to the WORLD. You attack NYC, you kill a part of your self. Even a guy in Idaho knows that.

7:50 AM  
Blogger ThursdayNext said...

Mom of Three ~ Indeed, sadly I think you are right. They have corrupted the Koran, and hence have corrupted their souls.

Rossi ~ I think the scar shall always remain, and sadly, for some, it is still an open wound that has not healed. Thank you so very much for your words of encouragement on your amazing blog.

Barry ~ The first night of viewing it, it didnt strike me as much, but by the second night, I really felt like nature and humans were one during this anniversary. Thinking of you. Thanks for being there.

7:50 AM  
Blogger David said...

Oh, and Sting's "Fragile" hasn't sounded the same since.

7:51 AM  
Blogger ThursdayNext said...

David ~ Yes, "Fragile" does seem to resonate more these days following the attack. I admit to being angry by those who are organizing to wave the American Flag tomorrow. It should be out each day, not just on the 11th of September. I find people ignorant if they associate the flag with the current administration; Old Glory is much more than that. She isnt even that! Yes, I think New York is a beautiful model of what the world should be, because there are so many of us mixed in here and we get along beautifully, for the most part.

Just yesterday, An Armenian woman, a Jewish woman, and an African-American woman were planning a food crawl through the highly populated Indian area known as Jackson Heights...except these women decided to start at a Malaysian restaurant first. This life is beyond good...this life is the best. If only everyone knew that...

7:59 AM  
Blogger PeeJ said...

Poignant stuff. I remember trying to get home and sitting in an airport 2 days after 9/11 - the hysteria was incredible and the fear in passenger's faces was also something chilling. I really felt like the world moved that much closer to something apocalyptic and people would never be able to relax again, there would always be this dark shadowy fear lurking.

Of course it hasn't gone away either. The bombings here last year in June were nowhere near on the scale of 9/11 but still shocked us to the core - As you so beautifully put it, if they don't love their children enough to not strap C4 to them and send them to their doom, what hope have we ever got of rationalising with them, or reaching some sort of diplomatic solution to this war on terror?

Peej

4:42 AM  
Blogger work in progress said...

I wish I could bring myself to leave a sentimental comment, but you've left me somewhat beyond words.

Moving post Amy, my dear.

1:43 PM  
Blogger Bird said...

thank you. i've tried to stay away from the blogosphere today adn from this topic - thinking that there would be diatribes and hatred spilling forth. bigotry and hysterica - reinvented and re-membered.

but i was compelled to make a few sweeps through the sphere, and yes, i found what i expected, what i dreaded. but i also found your post.

yours is a sensitive voice, thoughtful, honest, and void of the bullshit. thank you.

10:57 PM  
Blogger Clearlykels said...

I loved that post. That is a huge compliment because I cannot bring myself to think about this tragedy-- I do what I always do when something is going to make me sad I ignore it. Your post was too beautiful to ignore. xoxo

11:33 AM  
Blogger ThursdayNext said...

I appreciate everyone's thoughts and comments on this post.

8:10 PM  
Blogger Mayden's Voyage said...

Amy-
My son and I are coming to the area on Sep 30th- I'll email you the details...
I've been pouring over books, studying maps- talking to New Yorkers on the phone.
The 11th rolled around and I was stunned at how real it seemed to me...how much more real, now that I was planning a trip to Manhattan.
And how grieved I was- how much MORE greif I felt- and I was heartbroken for a long time over the attacks...still am.

Beautiful, well said- touching. "If the Russians loved their children too..."
The song applies in this case as well.
Hugs to you~

10:45 PM  

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