Eyre Affairs

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Sunday, July 15, 2007


"I wish you joy, Miss!" ~ Jane Eyre


Readers, last night I had the priviledge of being the maid of honor for my best friend's wedding (JSarah). The past few weeks have been spent happily consumed with plans for the special occassion, and I look forward to sharing vignettes and images from this beautiful day.


I gave a toast at the end of cocktail hour, and I am reprinting it here...


E, throughout the twenty years of friendship I have shared with J, she and I have always referred to each other as kindred spirits, a term used lovingly by one of our favorite fictional heroines, Anne Shirley, to describe her bond with her best friend, Diana Barry. Tonight, as I listened to your wedding vows to J, I can only describe a revelation I had as being the commencement of another special bond. E, you and I are kindred spirits, because we both know that J is the most amazing woman to have as a best friend.

The moments I treasure the most with J are when she and I have worked together as a team. We have danced together, walked a picket line together, produced benefits together, and have even planned a wedding together. Her loving nature, passionate integrity, and inspiring strength are always prevalent in these moments of teamwork. E, how fortunate you are to have J as a partner for life.

I think my favorite moments of teamwork with J are the moments when we cook together. Whether we are cooking for each other or cooking for others, it is always special for me to witness her desire to give to others both literally and metaphorically using her hands. One of the best meals we made together as a team was for her Grandmother Rita and her Uncle Monroe many summers ago. We took over Rita’s kitchen in Sag Harbor and worked diligently to prepare bruschetta and pasta primavera. Jand I agreed that Rita and Monroe were bemused at the two little women cooking up a big meal in their honor and fussing around the kitchen to make it perfect for them. We also agreed that there is no such thing as fussing too much over family.

I know that you both will receive various pieces of advice about marriage, but I truly believe the best advice stems from our relationships with our families. As imperfect as families sometimes are, we must always forgive. You both are now a family together, and I know that in moments where imperfection may surface, you will always forgive each other.

E and J, as I sat last night at dinner with both of your families, it was evident that all of the qualities that I love about both of you are gifts passed down from your wonderful family members. The smiles of joy last night and tonight on the faces of the H-----and B------ families are the best part of this celebration for me. For those family members who are not with you tonight, mainly all of your grandparents, I believe that they too are smiling with joy down on you both.

On that note, I would like to add one more reading to tonight’s celebration. This reading is a poem by one of my favorite poets, Rita S----, written on August 2, 1944 entitled
One YearTo my husband, on the first anniversary of our engagement…


I think upon a time when there was loneliness

And the world afraid.

No light warmed me

No light to fill the emptiness

That lived inside me.

Inside me alone?

Not alone---

Upon the earth a scourge flourished.

Days and nights and fire consumed time.

Aflame the world.

Aflame my heart.

You came to me.

Upon the battlefields—new victories.


Ladies and Gentleman, please raise your glasses and toast to J and E – may your hearts always be aflame. Cheers.

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12 Comments:

Anonymous www.mymixedcompany.com said...

This is very touching. So nice to read a NICE story about a maid of honor. The last time I was a maid of honor things did not work out as well. Weddings sometimes have a way of changing women and their expectations of their friends. You are in a mature friendship, one that will most likely grow for years. Thanks for sharing and hope you are doing well!

4:45 PM  
Blogger Shannon said...

That is beautiful. I am going to be a bridesmaid in a very dear friend's wedding next month and I am so happy to share in the day. You really nailed down that feeling.

4:53 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thanks for making us all cry last night - hehe. But in all seriousness, awesome job and well done na-na. :D

5:57 PM  
Blogger question girl said...

will you be MY maid of honor?

2:50 PM  
Blogger Wizened Wizard said...

Lovely. What a blessing such a friendship is.

12:16 PM  
Blogger Vixen said...

Can I hire you to speak at my wedding? That was such a beautiful toast. I hope my friends are as happy for me when that day comes as you truly are for yours.

1:50 AM  
Blogger foam said...

your fondness and love for your friend is very evident. here's to good and everlasting friendship.

8:21 AM  
Blogger ThoughtsGalore said...

That's the best toast..ever. Beautiful sweetie. Here's to Kindred spirits...
Cheers
xoxo
C

8:31 AM  
Blogger Jen R. said...

I hope I can come up with a friend to give me such a flattering toast by the time I tie the knot!

9:07 PM  
Blogger Clearlykels said...

That was great! You did a wonderful job. When I was giving a toast at my best friend's wedding it was really impromptu... as in she gave me the, "you are the maid-of-honor, take the mike away from that guy and make him stop" So, I gave a toast. It made them both cry. It is now one of the best moments of my life.

Also, last year I was at a wedding and the best man started a toast with, "I knew Patrick was saved when..." Now, Jesus and I are tight, but come one... in your toast.... xoxo

4:47 PM  
Blogger LADY LUXIE said...

How simply heartwarming. Makes me think of the friends I have right now.

Oh'..and I have made good with what I said a few months ago. I have purchased another copy of Jane Eyre
( somebody borrowed the one I had years ago..It was never returned and I cannot recall who. )and am reading it with relish once again :>

1:20 AM  
Blogger joanna said...

I guess I have become a little jaded with weddings, but it was a very touching story

11:42 AM  

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